Snow Globes

Recently, I received a snow globe as a gift from two of the members of my cymbal line in the indoor percussion group, Imperial Percussion Theater, that I fondly call my brothers. The funny thing about snow globes is that you can shake, twist, and turn them over as many times as you like, but the "snow" inside will always fall back down to its original position. I wish I could say the same for myself. I wish you could push me around and the snow inside of me wouldn't fall and would remain in its place. These days I feel like anything could shake me and cause me to melt. I guess it's that time of year though, isn't it? Every student this time of year will soon have their finals drawing near like an impending rain storm. I feel like emotionally I am shaken, physically I am exhausted, and for what? A number? (A certain three digit one across the board would be nice). What if the world does end in 2012? I have my doubts that it will, but if it does I'll be able to die knowing I spent my whole life...in school? What if I decided to live my Rent's mantra "No Day But Today"? I start out by spending my whole day outside tomorrow. Swimming, jogging, picnic-ing. (no that doesn't mean I'd be editing pictures...) Anything! For a few days after that I'd probably do the same thing, just because I could. I'd love everyone around me like I had an incurable disease and eat whatever I wanted because my weight wouldn't matter. For two whole years, I'd spend the money I had on whatever I wanted until it ran out (which would probably last a week, maybe). And then what? Would I miss school? Who knows. I guess I appreciate the education I've gotten, but at the same time...if everyone was educated would education still mean the same as it does now, or would it be missed if no one was? I can't wait to go into the education field. I am already aware of the fact that I'm going be making no money and I'm okay with that. I've decided recently that I'm going to teach elementary and I couldn't be more excited. It's like I have a new found lease on life because I chose this for myself, as opposed to it being chosen for me. I have something to look forward to that's going to make me happy, for the rest of my life. Maybe that's a little bit selfish, but I'm okay with that.

The Best Part of Belief is the Lie

So, as I am writing my first blog entry I am also watching Gone with the Wind for the second time. I thoroughly enjoy watching this movie and it's a shame I never took the time to watch it until last year. I guess in some ways it isn't though, I probably wouldn't have had any interest in this sort of movie when I was younger anyways. Upon watching this movie, I have affirmed my thoughts that society these days is just plain rotten. Here these people are in the wake of war and poverty stricken, and they come together. Although the stupid floozy doesn't have her epiphany until two husbands are in the ground and her third love is walking out the door, she does show great strength in the face of her trials. What would our nation do if we had to live ten days without technology due to a great disaster? Would we come together as a unified front and rise above and find a solution to bring our precious technology back to us? Or would we rise above the need for technology and start over from scratch? I'm not a fool, I understand that there is little probability of us having a disaster which would cause us to be without any form of technology. But it's still interesting to think about. I dislike the fact that certain members of my family don't come upstairs in my parents' house anymore because they can just as easily call everyone on their phones to wake them up and save time rather than waste time walking into each room and shaking each sleepy child out of dreamland. I just wish that women still got dressed up and didn't wear certain things because it isn't appropriate, women were taught proper etiquette, they were taught how to prepare meals for the family, etc. Although I do appreciate my education, why can't there be a happy medium? I'd like to have been taught how to take care of my home and to be well rounded in my education as well personally. That's obviously something I can change within myself by learning how to cook, but I just wish there was more opportunity for us to be taught is all. I'm sure all people don't feel this way, but I just wish things were different and it is my firm belief that our society doesn't know how to talk to each other anymore. Everything is easier to say on the internet right? It's easier to be bold and be anyone you want to be or say whatever you like when the person receiving the message isn't staring you in the face. I wish I could change things by typing this blog, change people's outlook on the world today, but I know that isn't going to happen and I'll probably be the only one that ever reads this. If nothing else, I guess I can rest easy knowing that I got my thoughts "out there".